whoots :D for ONCE i finished the geog paper (: BE PROUD OF ME, MISS GOH. YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO :D haha. anyways, damn high after that larh... jumping around and just couldn't study. SOOOOOOO. olivia and i went down to far east to eat slice! yay! super duper FAT now larh. i ate slice then the chicken then guava, so much D: anyways, the high-ness has died le...sigh. I SHALL...FINISH THE HUMAN GEOG PAPER TOO! yay :D :D :D :D actually, i felt a shrp pain in my wrist during the paper but i continued writing and persevered and I FINISHED THE PAPER :D :D :D :D woohoo! life is great :D
right. i'm so sick of keeping up this pretense. when can i ever be myself again? i feel like my goal in life is to make others happy. but what of myself? must i be gay in front of others to bring laughter to their lives at the expense of my own? it may sound selfish, but does my happiness not count? like when i felt pressurised before math and geog and chem, i felt like i couldn't let others know and tried to smile and laugh like normal. i don't like to see others sad, but why do i have to pretend to be happy? sigh.
felt really nostalgic yesterday. idk why but i just kept thinking back on the happy moments i spent with handbells, 4GY, 2SE etc. i guess... maybe i'm just entering a stage of depression D: hmms. no one knows. really. actually, no one really knows what i'm thinking and how i feel, or should i say no one cares. and i also don't have the courage to voice my opinions for fear that others would feel hurt or sad or unhappy or depressed or worried. am i just meant to play a supportive role all my life? i hope not.
